EMERGENCY SERVICES FOUNDATION FAMILIES GUIDE | 19 | EMERGENCY SERVICES FOUNDATION FAMILIES GUIDE 18 Supporting Emergency Service Workers Don’t be afraid to say what you see! Having a trusted person say that they have noticed a change in us can be what gets us thinking ‘I need help’ and the earlier that someone seeks help the less likely their condition will develop into something more serious. Initiating a Conversation It’s not uncommon to feel uncertain about discussing mental health and worry about saying the wrong things. Here are some constructive phrases, derived from the experiences of individuals who have experienced low mental fitness, which are particularly helpful during challenging times. These statements aim to create a conversation where someone feels heard, understood, and hopeful about the possibility of improvement.“ “ I’ve noticed you don’t seem yourself lately, are you doing OK” or “I’ve noticed this change in you…, are you alright?” Telling people, the change you’ve noticed shows them you care enough to pay attention. It may also help them think about changes they have been trying to ‘fob-off’ or minimise. “I’m here for you.” Expressing explicit support and commitment during recovery can be immensely comforting to individuals dealing with anxiety and depression, who often feel isolated. “ I can see this is a really hard time for you.” Validating the difficulty of the experience is one of the most helpful things you can say. Avoiding statements that shut down the conversation, such as “I know how you feel” or “You’ll be alright,” is crucial. “ I’m not sure what to do, but I’m sure we can figure it out together.” Acknowledging that you may not have all the answers but are committed to staying and helping figure out a way forward is important. “ Are there resources or people at (agency) I can contact for us?” Request permission to reach out on behalf of your family member, allowing you to discover available supports that may be in place. “ What would be most helpful for you right now? Encourage honesty about how you can provide support. Recognise that their needs may change throughout their recovery, so be flexible in your assistance. “ It sounds like you are in a difficult period right now.” Promote hope by reminding them that diminished mental fitness is normal and often seasonal, and with the right support, most people recover.. “ Have you thought about seeing your doctor or calling the employee assistance program?” Emphasise the significance of seeking professional support. While friends and family can offer substantial support, professionals play a crucial role in promoting mental fitness and fostering recovery. “ Are you considering suicide or self-harm?” Don’t hesitate to ask this question. If the answer is affirmative, express gratitude for their trust, reassure them of your love and support, and help in connecting immediately with crisis support. *Derived in part from “What to say and why” by Beyond Blue Another good reference for speaking with people about mental health concerns is the RUOK guide available here. Typically, people say ‘I’m fine’ when you first show concern. Don’t give up. Be sure to ask again.
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